Feeling Melancholy

So right now, I feel melancholy, for... Three reasons. Let's see.
1) I am typing this on my computer, which is fantastic because it is brand new and runs amazingly, But I'm upset. It doesn't have Microsoft Office at all, No word, no powerpoint, no anything. It doesn't have a graphics card. At all. Just an inbuilt basics card, for visuals, no 3-D no nothing. And I want to be able to play decent games.

2) I am angry at myself, I have done no work this weekend. I've procrastinated and been out. I had research to do for two assignments. And this is the fucking story of my whole schooling life. Basically, my schooling = fuck. I have failed that much stuff or done worse then I have before, or bad when on the rare occasion I try really hard. I am scared I will go nowhere in life.

3) I've come to the conclusion that something is wrong with me
And here's why: I don't want to be human, I think the way the average human thinks, acts and behaves is disgusting, and even thought I am likely very close to that anyway, I can't shake the thought that I don't want to be associated with most humans. I'm like the Doctor, I want to be outside them, and their friend, but I don't want to be them. I think I am better. When I know I'm not. It fucks with my brain. Fuck you Brain.

But, yes. Thanks for reading about my Melancholiness.
Night,
Reginald

Update :)

So, just an update on my life

1) I hate everything school.
2) I did a puppetry show on abuse tonight, for 5 year olds, it went a lot better then I thought it would.
3) I want to know where to go in life.
4) I am currently wearing 3 accessories.
5) I have Zoee`'s Halloween/Birthday on this weekend, I am going as a creepy executioner.
6) I got a new computer. The internet refuses to work on it.
7) I bought Coldplay's new album this afternoon and am currently listening to it. It's magical. 

Rupod Scrambled

This will be a short or long post, I'm not sure yet, but It has one purpose, I want to let a few people I know how proud of them I am.

I've found recently, I have told quite a few people that I am proud of them. Now this might be a weird term, but what I mean is, the things they have done, whether deliberate or not have made me think. Wow, that's impressive, I am happy to call them a very decent human being and my friend. That's what I mean by proud.

The following people have achieved this from me:
Romana Rose: You'll have to know her blog to know who this is, But I have told her the reasons why I am proud of her. to sum it up, perseverance in times of struggle.
Josh Modrow: For managing to do two things. The first, be almost exactly me, in the way we think, some of our favorite things, and a few other things. And the second for, no matter what shit either of us go through, always being there as a friend to talk to if needed. Thank you man.
Joseph Dowsett: For moving across the world, to a place where they don't even speak the same language, and, even against those odds, being a fantastic interesting funny guy.
Zoee` Eccles: Perseverance, bravery, a strong mind, heart, will and a quick tongue.

And a half mention to two people:
Amelia Baxter: For many the same reasons as Romana, But my only wish is that she would fight harder against herself to take control of what she wants to be. Which is possible, I know from experience.
Aden Morrisson: For strength, and a really strong will, the ability to fight whatever he wants to till the end. But I wish he would pick those battles better.

Thank you all for being in my life.

Roginald Muffin Barris

Immaturity and sickness.

I just noticed that this is my 70th post on this blog, which means, up until this was posted, I had 69 blog posts. It made me giggle. I'm so immature.

So I'm sick. On the mend though.
It's nothing really major, Just a fever and a sore neck, which gives me a headache occasionally. And stomach cramps, but they were there before I was sick.

I really hope I will be better in time for Bec's party tomorrow night. Because I'm excited to go. Should be fun, I heard mention of mountain dew.

I'm currently sweating, whether this is from the fever or the temperature I am unsure. In any case, it's gross.

I have to get organized with my costume for my party, hopefully Mum will take me to spotlight tomorrow, and I'll see what I can do about finding some silver fabric for a cape. I also need to get silver spraypaint, and a pair of pants.

Then all will be well.

Just a quick post about awesomeness.

If any of you 11 followers of mine are american, or know anyone who is, you should download and read the FREE Skulduggery Pleasant E-Book as it is absolutely fantastic and it will change your life.

http://bit.ly/qNJYCP

Soup Explosion.

So, I managed to to almost burn down our kitchen just then.
Which would be the second time for it.
The first having been caused by Aden.

But anyway, earlier tonight I put some soup on the stove to reheat.
I then came upstairs and forgot it was on.

Just before, after posting that previous blog post, I smelled burning. Then I remembered, I ran downstairs to find the soup had exploded. Or so it looked like, there was just a ring of pumpkin across the entire stove, the floor, the fridge, the walls.

An orange corona of soup. darkening as it burned the closer to the pot it was.
Just took me a good 15 minutes to clean up, and hopefully, nobody will ever know about it. Not sure how I will explain the burned pan though.

Roger.

Apologies and Birth.

So, I apologize to all my fellow followers floating freely through my posts that my last two blog posts were so very short.

To make up for this, The following blog post if for them.

So, Upon reading Miss Ramona Rose's blog post about birthdays I thought, hell, let's do that too.
It's my birthday in... 2 weeks exactly.
And I'm actually super pumped, which is a new thing for me. See, my birthdays have never been, overly dramatic things, usually presents in the morning, maybe a small get together at the beach.

But it's my 16th this year, and as such my thought pattern went like this:
"It's my 16th, what should I do for my birthday. Probably the same thing as I always do. Actually no, Fuck it, Let's have a costume party"

So we did.. are.. whatever.
It's an original superhero/villian mask party.
So, you have to make up a superhero/villain, come dressed as them, and incorporate that into your costume somehow.
Should be amazing.
Oh, and for those of you that don't know, "we" refers to me and my twin brother.

The other thing is that, This month, the only weekend that I don't have a birthday party on, is the one just gone. It's gone and will go like this:
Elinor Geary's party: 1st
This weekend: Nothing
Next weekend: Bec John's party
After that: My party
And on the 30th, Zoee`'s Birthday/Halloween party.

It should be an amazing time, and I am very excited to go to all of them.

Thanks for reading this probably rather boring post,
Roger M. Stuff.

P.S The lovely Juanita Dullaway is getting me a morphsuit, which I am so very excited for, despite the fact everyone will be able to see my "figure"

Tear and Brooklyn

I was listening to Brooklyn by Woodkid earlier and it brought tears to my eyes.
I don't know why.

Brain.

What the actual fuck?

Complicated Overthinking.

So, I was thinking, ans due to a chat I recently had, this blog's topic will be concerning women, and their tendency to overthink and over complicate things, when the answer is right in front of them.

Now I'm not saying that only women do this, No Sir E.
Men do it too, but the person in question was a girl and seemed to be stuck thinking this way.

Here's an example.
Her: It took him 10 minutes of me turning away from him and not talking to him to realize someting was wrong. And in that time I was crying, he has and had no idea.
I'm not complaining that no one sees the real me, i'm jus saying that hardly anyone has seen it.
Me: That's because you hide it? Well maybe instead of you waiting for him to notice.. you could.. tell him?
I know it's radical.

See what I mean?
I just don't understand the point in the way some people think. It's like.. I'm going to overthink this, and that is perfectly reasonable.

When all it takes is a chat with one logical person to prove otherwise.
But it's not just this either, there's another thing that confuses the eff out of me.
Putting yourself down.. like "I am stupid"
This confuses me for 2 reasons.
1) Enough people in the world will put you down anyway, why add more?
2) There is no benefit to doing this, it just makes you sad, and.. where's the point in making yourself sad?

Unless you enjoy it, and you're some kind of... sadist..
*bah dum chsssh*

That's all for now folks
:D
Roggie S.

Wants.

I want to be able to tranpose my thoughts onto page. Automatically.
All this stories, thoughts, ideas, are cluttering my head.

I want.. to eat lasangne, and drink a fine port wine. And have an intellectual discussion.

I want to know exactly what dreams are and everything about them. I want to see Tom Rogers, and converse with him, about books and such.

I want school to not exist. Instead, we all learn through audio-visual headsets, and there are no assignments, it merely scans our brain to see if we understand.

I want to have learnt my lines for the play I'm in. 

 I want to.. Build a society on an island, based on decent values, intellectual endeavors, companionship, appreciation of life. and have it last at least until I die (or ascend), after which point, I'll have stopped caring. 


I want to write a novel.


i want to see the world.  


I want the world to see me. 


I want.. a general level of insane sanity.  


I want to live.

Shittitting.

So, I've fucked around all holidays and I hate myself for not doing these assignments, and I have noone to blame but myself.

yay. :3